I asked God if he could turn me in something unnatural, for unnatural are the happiest beings. They don't know how to cry, they don't know why to cry for all they know is how to scrafice themselves so that others don't cry. They don't know how to smile, they don't know why to smile for all they care is others should smile. They don't run for an endless thirst because they don't want to run.
The more the natural I am, the more the selfish I am for I know when should I cry and when shall I not, for I have reasons to smile and I always seek them. For I try to steal the moments that take my breathe away. For I wish to feel the warmth of someone who could make me smile and fill my life with her smiles. For I can even smile on the days when some other natural beings have seen disaster. The more I smile, the more selfish I am. Why am I so selfish? I want to ask the God, Why am I so selfish? For I am a natural being? For why can't I cry when people cry, for why can't I be a reason for them to smile.
For I am a natural being I can reason out why shall I be selfish. For I know its an inherent property of a natural being. For I understand. For even if I dont understand, I make myself understand that I must be selfish. I must make my own path by hurting others, hurting those who were heading the path, to claim that I made the path.
Then I saw a disaster occurring on the door step of the God herself!! I saw people died once again. I saw they were running for their lives. I saw they were crying if someone could help them. I saw kids looking for their fathers, wives for their husbands, mothers for their sons, fathers for their sons. I saw. I did see this all. I did not cry. For I could change the channel and now I have a reason to smile. The same old thirst that never gets satisfied. Why do I want to smile so much when stones, even bamboos, even the deads are crying? They are trying every possible bit to help them. May be I could make myself understand that none who died were my relatives. May be I could again make myself understand that, that is the way life is. Yes, even if I could understand, still I wish to ask God. Why did she do this with the people who came for her blessings? I will ask God, why??
She replied harshly "Such a disaster happened. You are still happy. You are still happy for you are still a natural being, all alive." Then I asked God, Do I really want to be turned to an unnatural being? For I am happy hundreds of people died, for I can still smile or even flatter. She then replied smiling, "No you don't."
She then told me that I am selfish, for you believe or not but trust you must.
